Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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