you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
A bitchslap is in order.
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