I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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