I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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