"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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