I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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