i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
