"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize