are you so shy because you have an std?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
