You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize