Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
