D3 body, D1 cock
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
