I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
