We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Randomize
