I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
