she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize