he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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