I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
