my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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