STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
