you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
