she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
