Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
