WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
