i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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