Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
