Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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