8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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