So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I didn't notice because vodka
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
