Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
