How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize