the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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