Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
