i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize