So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
she pinky promised me she was 18
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
