just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
