Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
