If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
