If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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