Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
