Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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