did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
