Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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