you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
