It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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