I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
