what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
