too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
