Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
