if i died would you start the facebook group?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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